[The park hums with a strange kind of life— rides creaking on their own, laughter of shadows spilling from nowhere. Char wanders through it at his own pace, barefaced, no mask to mediate the look of surprise that lights up his face when he nearly collides with a familiar figure. For a moment he simply stares, taking in the sight— not an automobile with a sexy red interior, but a man.]
...So you do walk on two legs after all.
[His lips skew into a lopsided smile, wry amusement breaking through the weariness etched into his features.]
I'll admit, I almost forgot you were ever a man to begin with.
[ pardon if lavi doesn't immediately acknowledge char* approaching him as he's still very much so coming to terms that he is himself again. perfectly complete with his memories and everything else perfectly in place. or supposedly that is the case... he'll be fussing with his bandanna and scarf when looks to char, finally, with a pout.
a pout, facial expressions, that people can finally see again. it'll be nice for people to fully see him again and properly interact with them. ]
Hey, don't forget that when we first, it was when I was a person! [ ignore that he's patting his person and doing checks over it. nothing out of place? is everything really here? ] It is weird having my body back after fifteen days of not having it. Or, seventeen if we count the days where I spent being "dead".
[Char's smile lingers, faint but genuine, watching the way Lavi pats himself down as though he might still be missing pieces. There's relief in seeing him whole again. Instead, he tips his head slightly, answering with the same dry cadence as before.]
Fair enough. I'll give you that. I suppose it's easier to remember the man when he's standing here in front of me.
[At the question, he exhales through his nose, the expression on his bare face more tired than conflicted.]
No mask for the end. It's better this way. If I'm to walk away from all of it... then I'll walk away as myself.
That's how it goes for most people, isn't it? Out of sight, out of mind...so the saying goes. Except when it comes to me—I'd never forget anyone I saw.
[ there's a bit of a sheepish laugh mixed with a slight grumble because, thanks to everything here, lavi knows what it's like to have a memory closer to what "normal" people have and it's miserable. to have memories and facts that you're supposed to know about someone suddenly no longer in your grasp despite knowing that you knew at one one..
he shakes his head and places a hand on his hip now that he's satisfied that everything seems to be in place. lavi saw this face while he was a simple shadowman, but now, face-to-face like this, he wants to make sure he remembers it like this. ]
Good; I'm fond of Nishi. I'm glad that I get to leave this place with him. Not that there's anything wrong with Char, of course. I just didn't get to know Char very well.
[ because even though they are the same person, char also only knows "lavi" even though lavi also exists. ]
[For a moment, Char stands in contemplative silence, weighing Lavi's words. Fond of Nishi. Glad to leave with him. It's strange, to be told outright that someone prefers the man without the mask, stranger still to feel no urge to deflect with irony. He lets the silence stretch before he answers, as if cradling it in his mind.]
Then I'll count myself lucky. There aren't many who say they prefer Nishi.
[A pause, his lips quirking with the faintest dry humor, but his gaze remains steady.]
Char is easier to understand. He knows his lines, keeps the audience satisfied. Nishi... he'd rather be in the audience.
[He shifts slightly, turning his face toward the park lights flickering off the water's shifting surface.]
But if you're glad to know him, then maybe there's more to him worth keeping than I thought.
[ while char mulls over lavi's words, he'll quietly take in the sounds of the park. is this still the ending that everyone would have wanted? is this how things should end for everyone? it'd be a funny way to end their wild tale; lavi hums to himself when char finally speaks up.
char certainly is easier to understand if you know what kind of person to expect, lavi will agree with that, but he did like the more complicated people. people you have to search for to find more about them. ]
Maybe that's why I like Nishi a bit more; I'm not much of performer and much happier to stay in the background and listen to what others have to say.
[ he'll move to cross his arms behind his head to join char looking off to the distance. ]
[His question is almost funny— great plans, hm. In reality, his plans have never been so simple, his goals so attainable. It feels foreign, like stepping into a life he's never known.
He lets a small, honest smile show anyway. For once, the mask feels unnecessary.]
I'm planning to stop pretending the world needs me to be an exemplar.
[His voice is quiet and steady. The words are a list of ordinary things that feel, to him, radical: laying down a uniform, learning how to stay, learning how not to make every hour into a strategy.]
I can't guarantee I'll succeed in living a "normal" life, but it's the trying that matters sometimes, isn't it?
[ ooh?? this is not the response he thought he'd get. ]
Wow... How drastic three weeks can make of a man. Then again, we probably went through more things in these three weeks than most people do in several of their lifetimes.
[ he'll chuckle before humming to himself.
sure, lavi experienced many things here that were reminiscent of home, it didn't mean that they were the exact same. ...for better or for worse, of course. there's some sort of strange comfort in knowing that there's a place worse off than where you're coming from (but also nice to see how it can be saved). ]
Living a "normal" life is probably one of the hardest things to do, you know. You never know what sort of thing will pop-up and give you a scare. [ lavi's sure he won't have to spell it out to char what he means here. ] But, maybe if there was anyone, I could see you succeeding in living a "normal" life. Perhaps even a "peaceful" one.
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EPILOGUE
...So you do walk on two legs after all.
[His lips skew into a lopsided smile, wry amusement breaking through the weariness etched into his features.]
I'll admit, I almost forgot you were ever a man to begin with.
no subject
a pout, facial expressions, that people can finally see again. it'll be nice for people to fully see him again and properly interact with them. ]
Hey, don't forget that when we first, it was when I was a person! [ ignore that he's patting his person and doing checks over it. nothing out of place? is everything really here? ] It is weird having my body back after fifteen days of not having it. Or, seventeen if we count the days where I spent being "dead".
[ and because this is worth addressing: ]
No mask for the end, Nishi?
no subject
Fair enough. I'll give you that. I suppose it's easier to remember the man when he's standing here in front of me.
[At the question, he exhales through his nose, the expression on his bare face more tired than conflicted.]
No mask for the end. It's better this way. If I'm to walk away from all of it... then I'll walk away as myself.
no subject
[ there's a bit of a sheepish laugh mixed with a slight grumble because, thanks to everything here, lavi knows what it's like to have a memory closer to what "normal" people have and it's miserable. to have memories and facts that you're supposed to know about someone suddenly no longer in your grasp despite knowing that you knew at one one..
he shakes his head and places a hand on his hip now that he's satisfied that everything seems to be in place. lavi saw this face while he was a simple shadowman, but now, face-to-face like this, he wants to make sure he remembers it like this. ]
Good; I'm fond of Nishi. I'm glad that I get to leave this place with him. Not that there's anything wrong with Char, of course. I just didn't get to know Char very well.
[ because even though they are the same person, char also only knows "lavi" even though lavi also exists. ]
no subject
Then I'll count myself lucky. There aren't many who say they prefer Nishi.
[A pause, his lips quirking with the faintest dry humor, but his gaze remains steady.]
Char is easier to understand. He knows his lines, keeps the audience satisfied. Nishi... he'd rather be in the audience.
[He shifts slightly, turning his face toward the park lights flickering off the water's shifting surface.]
But if you're glad to know him, then maybe there's more to him worth keeping than I thought.
no subject
char certainly is easier to understand if you know what kind of person to expect, lavi will agree with that, but he did like the more complicated people. people you have to search for to find more about them. ]
Maybe that's why I like Nishi a bit more; I'm not much of performer and much happier to stay in the background and listen to what others have to say.
[ he'll move to cross his arms behind his head to join char looking off to the distance. ]
What great plans do you have for the near future?
no subject
He lets a small, honest smile show anyway. For once, the mask feels unnecessary.]
I'm planning to stop pretending the world needs me to be an exemplar.
[His voice is quiet and steady. The words are a list of ordinary things that feel, to him, radical: laying down a uniform, learning how to stay, learning how not to make every hour into a strategy.]
I can't guarantee I'll succeed in living a "normal" life, but it's the trying that matters sometimes, isn't it?
no subject
Wow... How drastic three weeks can make of a man. Then again, we probably went through more things in these three weeks than most people do in several of their lifetimes.
[ he'll chuckle before humming to himself.
sure, lavi experienced many things here that were reminiscent of home, it didn't mean that they were the exact same. ...for better or for worse, of course. there's some sort of strange comfort in knowing that there's a place worse off than where you're coming from (but also nice to see how it can be saved). ]
Living a "normal" life is probably one of the hardest things to do, you know. You never know what sort of thing will pop-up and give you a scare. [ lavi's sure he won't have to spell it out to char what he means here. ] But, maybe if there was anyone, I could see you succeeding in living a "normal" life. Perhaps even a "peaceful" one.